The Time Time Messes Up
by StarsInWinter
Summary: After accidentally travelling to the Marauders time (yes I know it's been done) Hermione has to survive the Marauders, dates, hexes, boys, flirting, prank wars etc. All while managing the twins and Harry who "accidentally" travel back. What would Harry think having his godfather hitting on his best friend? And their biggest goal is to make it out with their sanity. Right.
1. Turning the Time Turner

**Hey Everyone! So this is an idea my friend and I got and half the credit for the story goes to her (Awesome as Annabeth!) I PROMISE not to leave it hanging because I hate it when other authors do that. Hope you enjoy!**

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_The war ended. Finally, after years of preparing for this, it was over. Making sacrifices, decisions, and solving mysteries is finally done, and over with. Harry defeated Voldemort, and all is good in the world._

_But what happens if another Dark Lord arises? What if Voldemort isn't actually gone? What happens if this was all a hallucination, an illusion?_

_Don't be silly, _Hermione thought to herself. _We vanquished Voldemort, for good. Well, Harry did. If a new Dark Lord emanated, then we'd cover it. After all, who could be as malevolent as the Voldemort himself?_

Hermione shook her head, shaking the thoughts away, while heading towards the Griffindor common room. _Those thoughts won't do you any good. Focus on what's happening now, and do not dwell on the past._

Hermione walked up to the Fat Lady, where Neville was standing. "Neville! What're you doing here?" she exclaimed, her eyebrows furrowing.

"I wanted to get something, but I keep forgetting the password," he said, looking slightly sheepish.

_Even in his seventh year, he keeps forgetting. _Hermione thought, internally smiling. _Some things never change..._

"It's Transcendence." she said, as the Fat Lady swings open and followed him in.

The common room, like all the other rooms, was completely damaged. Regular spells wouldn't help this at all. Hermione sighed. The twenty students who were helping to rebuild Hogwarts, herself and Neville included, could meet up and figure out a spell, but after doing that for two months straight, she mentally groaned at the thought.

Neville turned to Hermione. "I can check the boys dormitories for anything simple and then I think we should call it off for today. You should get some rest as well."

Hermione nodded, giving him a grateful smile as he jogged upstairs. She, Harry and Ron were going to the burrow afterwards, and the thought of Molly's dinner made her mouth water. It also made her not pay attention and bump into someone. She whipped around to spot a raven haired boy with glasses. "Harry I'm so sorry!" Hermione exclaimed. "I wasn't paying attention and-"

"Hermione calm down," he said, interrupting her rambles. "It was just a bump! The world won't end!"

They both cracked a smile, but their eyes wavered. For some people the world did end. Hermione shook my head. _Don't dwell on the past._

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"The girl's dormitory," she answered. "Can you go do a quick sweep of the boy's dormitory with Neville? Then you and Ron can head back to the burrow."

He frowned. "What about you?"

"I'm going to stay a bit. I think I'll research a few simpler spells for us."

He smiled. "Alright, but don't stay too long. You work to hard anyway." Giving her hand a comforting squeeze, he head up, disappearing behind the door.

Hermione sighed softly and head back out, checking the other students. Most of them had head home except for Luna and Cho who were outside Professor McGonagall's office.

"Hello Hermione," Luna greeted. "I've checked the office for nargles and peskies. Luckily they had formed they're own nest in the corner so I decided not to disturb them

Cho, not wanting to seem rude, smiled politely at her before turning to Hermione. "The Ravenclaw common room is alright. I can try to ask my mom about some spells for tomorrow."

Hermione nodded, trying to sound enthusiastic. "That's great! But you both should really head home now."

They nodded and after brief goodbyes, they left.

Hermione entered the office. Most of the Professors were helping the Ministry so they rarely came here lately. Performing a quick cleaning charm in the office, she glanced around for anything out of place. Something sparkled in the corner. _Do nargles sparkle?_ she wondered making a mental note to ask Luna as she walked over and picked it up.

Hermione stared at it. She blinked making sure it was real. It was. _But how? Professor McGonagall returned it back in third year. The year we saved Sirius. I could still recall the way he looked at Harry. The fierce streak of concern and the slight wistfulness by his resemblance to James. The way he looked at him before that flash of green light..._

Hermione didn't know what else to do with the time turner so she slipped it around her neck, tucking it into her sweatshirt, and head back to the common room and ran up to the dormitory, sinking down into one of the beds. She sighed, allowing myself to relax. While none of the students helping out got a break, Hermione was managing the project so it was even worse for her. Closing her eyes and absently fingering the necklace, she pulled the covers over herself. She knew she had to work, but one minute couldn't hurt right? Just one more minute...

..."Oi Padfoot! Mooney! There's a girl on the floor!"

Being on the run for six months had sharpened her reflexes, which wasn't always a good thing. In this case, Hermione's first reaction was to swing a fast punch at whoever was above her.

"OW!" he roared, clutching his face. As her eyes adjusted, she realized she had broken his glasses. "You bring a whole new meaning to punching like a girl!"

"I am so sorry!" Hermione exclaimed. "Hold on a second." She pulled out my wand. "Occulus Reparo." With a flourish, the glasses were easily repaired and placed neatly on the bridge of his nose.

His eyes widened in surprise as he pulled them off to be certain. "Gee thanks," he said with a smile. "I'll have to remember that."

Hermione nodded silently. The guy looked a lot like Harry. A lot like Harry. Then something clicked. "Wait did you say-"

Another boy burst in, startling her, panting and glancing around wildly. "What happened?" He glanced at Hermione, confusion filling his face. "Who are you?"

"I'm, er, Hermione Granger," Hermione said quickly said, gripping her wand in case of an obliviate. Her other hand fingered the time turner as she one again hexed herself for wearing it to bed. "Sirius Black? James Potter?"

Sirius shrugged. "Well you already somehow know us," he said, hinting at an explanation.

"A friend of mine knows you both," Hermione explained wincing at the obvious lie.

"Oh yeah? Who?" asked James.

"Lily Evans."

James's eyes widened and a grin took over. "So she talks about me? Interesting."

"Very pleasant stuff," Hermione said sarcastically. Hesitating, she asked the one question which would confirm her sanity. "What year is it?"

Sirius looked at her curiously. "1975," he answered. "We're in fifth year."

By now, he and James were standing in front of Hermione, looking at her like I was crazy. Hermione shook her head. "No way, no way…"

She tried to grab the desk for support, but missed and fell onto James. She felt a sharp sting in my elbow and something hit my head, causing it to explode in pain. The last thing she heard was Sirius yell, "Mooney! The girl is dying!"

_Oh how I wish I could roll my eyes._

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**Please review and tell us what you think!**


	2. Making a Deal (Oh Merlin)

_Forget crucio, _Hermione thought. _I'd like to see Harry Potter survive a killer headache_.

She groaned. "Ow." Despite the pain, it came out weakly. Someone – a guy – laughed and muttered 'you got that right'.

Hermione slowly opened her eyes, and screamed. Luckily her arms were strapped down so she couldn't do any real damage, but the grinning face jumped back with a laugh.

Her heart sank as she recognized him. Her hopelessness changed to anger when she remembered what happened. "James?"

He looked at her innocently and she may have believed him, he was that good, but after a year of dealing with the Weasley twins, she knew better. "Yes?"

"Who brought me here?"

"Why that noble act would have been commit by me of course."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "How did I hit my head?"

"You fell."

Hermione sighed. _I may have hit my head but I am not stupid_. "Potter if you're really as noble as you put it, you would have caught me."

He frowned. "How do you know my last - wait," he looked affronted. "Of course I caught you!"

"But?" Hermione prompted impatiently.

"I dropped you," he admitted sheepishly.

Hermione opened her mouth but closed it again, wondering if she heard right. "You dropped me?" she reiterated for confirmation.

James winced. "Well Mooney and Wormtail burst in at that minute and I was surprised and accidentally dropped you." He hesitated. "And Wormtail accidentally kicked your head," he added. "And in shock, dropped his textbook on you."

_Wormtail_. _That filthy, no good, slimy, lying, cheating piece of dirt had the nerve to kick me in the head?!_ Hermione took a deep breath and closed her eyes. 2 seconds later she felt a sharp prick, and fell unconscious again.

The second time she woke up; there was a women in the room. She poured a glass of pumpkin juice and her face split into a smile as she realized Hermione was awake. "Thank Merlin!" she said with a sigh. "I thought I gave you too much sleeping potion!"

Hermione shook her head. "I'm fine," she said, accepting the glass from her. Taking a large sip she continued. "How long have I been here?"

She frowned in concentration. "It was 3, no 5…" she trailed off. "Or maybe a week." She shook her head. "I really don't remember." She stared at Hermione. "You're Ashley right? Or Marlene?"

Hermione stared at her. "When can I leave?"

She shrugged. "Well….I think you're supposed to stay for 10 days."

"What?"

"That's what the sheet says. I'll go check." She bustled out.

_Did I really want someone who had no idea what they were doing, help me out?_ Hermione tried to un strap herself, except it was too tight. Her wand was on the other table, too far for me to reach. She glanced around for any of the Marauders. "James Potter!" she hissed.

The wall beside the bed shifted over and Sirius popped his head in. "I'm Sirius Black not James Potter!" he mocked.

Hermione glared at him. "Give me my wand," she demanded.

Sirius very slowly climbed out of the passage way, yawned, and handed Hermione her wand at snail's pace. As soon as the wand touched her hand, Hermione zapped him with a jelly-leg jinx, and ignoring his complaining, got out of her bed.

As she stepped into the passage way, she realized she had no idea which direction to go. Hesitating, she sighed and pointed her wand back at Sirius, allowing him to stand up. He jumped up swiftly and glared at her. "That was unladylike," he said pompously.

Hermione snorted. "It that's unladylike then what's punching a guy?"

"You already did that," Sirius pointed out. "But it would be very unladylike, and since it was a Marauder it was very very unladylike and since that Marauder was going to ask out your friend it was very very very unladylike and since that friend was Lily Evans it's very very very very unladylike and since-"

"Shut up!" Hermione yelled.

He grinned. "And now that's unladylike!"

Hermione glared at him. "Take me back to the common room," she ordered.

Sirius crossed his arms. "What if I don't?"

Hermione narrowed her eyes and "accidentally" shrank her bed to one tenth of its size.

Sirius gulped. "Right then," he said in a nervous cheerful way, quickly backing away from her wand. "Come on."

Hermione followed him into the passageway, expecting to be in the common room in about 10 minutes.

But 10 minutes later, Hermione and Sirius were still wandering through the passageways.

"Where are we going?" Hermione demanded finally.

Sirius looked at her, puzzled. "Well I didn't know which common room you were in so I decided to take the long way around Hogwarts." He looked at her curiously while she looked ready to strangle him even though it was partially her fault. "Which house are you in?"

Hermione sighed. "Gryffindor," she snapped.

Sirius crossed his arms. "How do I know you're not an intruder?"

Hermione sighed again. "Hogwarts and foundation of its magic its structured on is specifically designed to reveal the truth on the Marauder's map, which you'd know about," she said pointedly.

Sirius's eyes widened. "How'd you know about that?"

Hermione snorted. "You and James aren't exactly the quietest people," she covered casually, praying it would work.

Sirius let out a loud and pathetic, "Hmph!" and walked off while Hermione rolled her eyes. Boys.

Eventually they reached the common room where James, Remus and Peter sat in the midst of an argument.

"But it doesn't make sense!" James whined.

Remus rolled his eyes. "It's English! How does it not-" he paused catching sight of Hermione and Sirius and his annoyance changed to concern. "How do you feel Hermione?"

Hermione smiled for the first time in hours. "Fine thanks," she said with a smile.

Peter, who was nervously drawing on his homework, spoke up. "Sorry about kicking you," he apologized.

"And sorry for dropping you," James added, not sounding sorry at all.

Hermione brushed it off, "It's fine," she said to Peter, not being able to sound as friendly. She sat down beside Remus since he was the safest Marauder. "Listen you guys I need your help."

Sirius smirked. "This should be interesting," he muttered but quiet down at a look from Remus.

"I have to speak to Professor Dumbledore," Hermione announced.

They all stared at her, before James snickered. "Yeah like that's gonna happen."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Hermione demanded.

"He hasn't exactly been coming out of his office for the past month," Peter explained. "Something about dealing with You-Know-Who's attacks."

Hermione's eyes widened and she couldn't stop the slight shudder._ Of course. Voldemort's still alive. And so are James and Lily. And Sirius. And Remus. And Peter isn't a traitor yet. And…_

Remus frowned. "Hermione are you okay? Should we take you back?"

"No," Hermione said quickly. "I'm fine." Getting back to their previous conversation she said, "but what about detentions and meals?"

Sirius shrugged and kicked at a pencil, rolling it under the couch. "No idea. We usually have our detentions with Minnie." His eyes widened. "Speaking of which, I gotta go!"

Remus rolled his eyes. "How long?"

Sirius tapped his head and frowned, trying to remember. He brightened. "2 hours. So till 9:00 pm." Shooting his friends a quick grin, he jogged out happily.

Hermione watched him leave. He seemed so carefree. And so did all the others. Remus and Sirius weren't constantly fearing their lives and James, while she wasn't too fond of him from his memory, reminded her a lot of the twins who could easily joke about anything in life. They didn't deserve any of the things that happened to them. But there was no point now. It had all happened. Now she had to concentrate on getting back.

"So Hermione," James started, stretching out on the couch. "Why do you need to see ol' Dumbles?"

_Dumbles? Oh.. Dumbledore!_ Hermione hesitated. "It's personal."

James gave her a lazy look. "Then I guess we can't help you," he replied simply.

Hermione glared at him, ready to yell, but paused. James and Lily were in the same year. Fifth. Lily was a prefect who had easily hexed James into obliviousness and back which so clearly had no effect on him. She took a deep breath. "What if I give you something in return?"

James's eyes narrowed. "Like what?" Remus and Peter exchanged glances, obviously curious.

Hermione smirked. "Well, I know for a fact that you 4 are quite the pranksters," she began, gaining their full attention. "And I know that pranks require a lot of thought and work," she continued. "And class is one time where you can't work, and you can't really use the washroom excuse for an hour," she said in mock sympathy.

James grinned excitedly. "What are you suggesting?" he asked eagerly.

Hermione pulled a box out of her robes, expanding it to full size. Opening up the intricate compartments, she revealed pieces of colorful sweets. She handed it over to James, who silently read the back, his eyes and grin widening with each second.

"Skiving Snackboxes!" He exclaimed handing it over to Mooney who read it eagerly. "Did you make these?"

Hermione shook her head. "No, my friend's brothers did," she answered truthfully. "I'll give you 2 full boxes AND and idea for a brilliant prank as long as you give me full credit for it," she told him. "Getting into trouble is the only way I'll have a chance of seeing Dumbledore."

James held out his hand with a smirk and Hermione shook it. "So what's the idea?" he asked, pulling a spare bit of parchment over and poising his quill over it.

Hermione grinned. "Fireworks."

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**There you go! I hope you enjoyed!**


	3. Pranks, Plans and Problems

**Sorry about the long wait, but I blame it on my homework. I did make this chapter longer though. And for those of you wondering when Harry and the twins are going to show up... either the next chapter or the chapter after.**

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Hermione let out a sigh of relief as she entered the girl's dormitories. Who knew accepting some of those sweets from the twins would help her out?

All the other girls were asleep, snoring softly. One of the beds was empty though. Between a girl with dark red flowing hair and a girl with soft brown curls. Hermione hesitated. The girl was probably out after hours. She'd be back soon. Where would Hermione sleep?

The answer came instantly. _The Room of Requirement._ Hermione frowned. _Do I have to break so many rules? Hexing Sirius… he deserved it. Passageways… I had to get out somehow. Giving a Marauder Skiving Snackboxes…I had to make a deal. Getting in trouble… I have to see Professor Dumbledore. Heading out after hours to sleep in the Room of Requirement… I have to sleep somewhere that's not a floor. _That settled it. She didn't have another choice really.

But before that, she hurried into the bathroom and locked the door behind her, flicking on the lights. Pulling out her wand, she performed a quick spell, watching in the mirror as she shortened slightly and the tiredness in her eyes disappeared to the spark of knowledge. Her slightly tamed hair was a pile of waves and curls. Just like she was in fifth year. Perfect.

Making her way back to the dormitories, she was surprised to see the girl with red hair sitting up, her green eyes, curious. Bright green eyes. Lily Evans. "Who are you?" Lily asked in a polite but firm voice, her wand already in her hand.

"Hermione Granger," Hermione answered back pulling out her own wand in case. "I showed up new here-" Hermione paused realizing the nurse hadn't told her how long she had been knocked out, "a while ago," she finished. "I was knocked out though."

Lily's face broke into a grin and she laughed. "You were that girl Potter and Black were yappering about?"

Hermione winced. "Is that what I'm known by?"

"Don't worry about it," Lily waved it of. "They'll do something stupid tomorrow and everyone will be amazed by that." She raised an eyebrow. "Where's your stuff?"

"It's going to be transferred here soon," Hermione lied swiftly. She could easily transfigure some clothes and books for a while.

Lily nodded and placed her wand at her bedside table. "Alright." She motioned toward the empty bed beside her. "You can sleep here. My friend Marlene isn't going to be here this year because of some Quidditch World Tour."

The bed, Hermione realized, was the one she used in her time. Lily's bed was Ginny's.

Hermione let out a sigh of relief at not having to sneak out. "Thanks," she said gratefully. She hesitated for a second. "Can you please do me another favor?"

Lily nodded again with a slight shrug. "I can try."

"I told James and Sirius that I already know you. If they ask you could you confirm it?"

Lily looked puzzled. "But why would you lie?"

"Long story," Hermione explained. "And it's not something I can share right now," she added. "It's okay actually-"

"No I don't mind," Lily answered absently, obviously lost in thought. "Listen, did Potter say anything about me?"

Hermione shook her head slowly. "No, why?"

"Well if he does, like I'm infatuated with him or overly mean or vicious, then don't believe it."

Hermione laughed. "Don't worry. My friends say the same thing about me, I know better," she said with a grin, remembering the George's vivid descriptions about her to some of the first years. Not that part of it wasn't true.

Lily let out a sigh of relief. It changed to a wince as Alice – the girl with brown hair – tossed a pillow at Lily. She shook her head. "Anyway, we should get to bed. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." A few minutes later, the dormitory was once again full of soft snores.

Hermione woke up surprisingly early from the sunlight peeking in through the curtains, specially angled toward her bed. She was just about to do a mental debate on whether or not to get up and close them since her head was too addled to remember the spell, or stay in bed and ignore it, before she sat up. She could easily talk to Sirius about the fireworks, help them prepare them and get detention and be home by tomorrow.

On that happy note, Hermione quietly got dressed and walked over the boy's dormitories. All of them lay fully clothed, and she was guessing by the empty bottles of butterbeer and candy wrappers, that they had had a celebration of some sort. Entering, she tried not to wince at loud snores. The 2 worst beds were in the back and the shockingly belonged to James and Sirius, who both had already kicked off their blankets and were twisting around, mumbling in their sleep

Hermione took a deep breath and backed out of the room, and perfecting her aim, sent a small stinging jinx to wake Sirius up. It did wake Sirius up. And his yell woke the rest of the boys.

"Who yelled?!"

"You're yelling."

"WHO YELLED?!"

"You did!"

"I didn't yell. I let out a many cry."

…

…

"What?"

"There's no such thing as a manly cry."

Sirius snorted. "Course there is. That's what men do when they're zapped with fire. It was burning, it was smoldering, it was-"

"A hex," Hermione cut in calmly who had had quite enough of his bragging. All the boys turned to her.

"You nearly killed me!" Sirius yelled.

Remus rolled his eyes. "It was a hex Padfoot."

"A dangerous one," Peter pointed out.

This time Hermione rolled her eyes. "James can I talk to you?"

James nodded, the grin still present. Sirius narrowed his eyes suspiciously before they brightened. "Oh about the fire-"

"About You-Know-What and what You-Know-Whats will You-Know-What need and to decide when You-Know-What will take place," Hermione cut in.

"Oh," Sirius said, realization dawning. James had hopefully told his friends. He frowned. "What's You-Know-What?"

"You Know You-Know-What!" James said loudly.

Remus groaned. "Prongs, he was at detention!"

James's eyes widened. "Oh yeah!" He dragged Sirius by the hair while Remus and Peter followed.

Hermione pulled out the parchment on which she had scribbled the ingredients. "How soon can you make it?"

While James and Sirius mulled over the parchment, Remus stared at Hermione. There was something odd about her. The way she acted. It was like she already knew James and Sirius would cause trouble so she kept them in their places. It was like she knew that Peter had done something wrong and was a bit cold to him. It was like she knew something about him even he didn't know. But most of all, it looked like she felt sorry for them. Why? He knew it was stupid, she was a stranger, but he felt them same way he did with Dumbledore. She knew something.

Hermione knew Remus was watching her. And she knew the question he had. But what could she tell them? She was still shocked, as she watched James and Sirius. James looked so much like Harry it hurt her. He'd grown up so fast and here… James was a boy. A fifteen year old boy whose biggest issue was detention. Not saving the world. Who could easily look at people without wondering if they were going to kill him. She almost expected him to look up and ask for help with homework the way Harry did. She almost expected Sirius's eyes to widen the same way they did as he fell through the archway. She almost expected Remus's gentle face to be replaced with the worries of an older man as he dealt with the order. And she almost expected Peter to tap his dark mark and summon You-Know-Who.

"This afternoon," Sirius spoke up.

Hermione snapped out of her thoughts. "What?"

"We can have this ready by the afternoon," James repeated. "We have most of these ingredients, we'll just have to borrow some stuff from Slughorn. It'll take roughly 2 hours to make and then we'll set them off."

Hermione nodded, satisfied. "Good. Just give me credit," she reminded.

Remus frowned. He caught Sirius's eyes and he could tell his friend was thinking the same thing. There was something awfully familiar about her.

"Are you sure about this though?" Peter asked worriedly. "I mean you don't even know if it will work."

"Oh it'll work," Hermione said with a smirk.

"Hermione?"

Hermione looked up to see Lily standing midway on the staircase with her bag in one hand, and Hermione's unpacked one in another. Several other girls had begun to come downstairs as well. Most seemed surprised to see Hermione with the Marauders. "I thought you might need this," she said holding out the bag. She glanced suspiciously at James who grinned back cheekily. She rolled her eyes. "And Remus," she added turning to the 'decent' marauder, "we have to go over some stuff today, will 6:00 work?"

"Hey Lily!" James said cheerfully.

Lily ignored him. "Remus?"

Remus opened his mouth to answer, but James beat him to it. "I'm fine Lils thanks for asking!"

Remus sighed. "Lily I may not be able to come today, can we do it tomorrow?"

Lily bit her lip. "Well, if we get up early then…"

"Yes I did try out a new look, how kind of you to notice!" James cut in.

Hermione bit her lip, holding back a smile as Lily purposely continued to ignore James. Sirius rolled his eyes.

Remus shot her a pained look as if saying 'what can you do?' "6:00 am then," he said quickly.

"Why no Lily, I'm not busy today, I'd gladly accompany you- HEY!" James was cut off as he narrowly dodged a jinx Lily shot at him. "I was just answering your thoughts," he grumbled.

Lily sighed. "Yes people have developed a habit of flirting with death," she said lightly, before walking out.

James watched her leave. "She loves me."

Hermione groaned. "See you later."

Hermione being Hermione managed to excel in all her classes, shocking the Professors and James and Sirius who had landed themselves in detention and dragged Remus and Peter along, during transfiguration. Currently she was sitting in charms, her long since finished assignment lying on her desk. The only other student finished was Lily who was calmly reading a book.

Professor Flitwick was trying to reach a quill – self marking, she noted – and ignored the notes being passed between 2 girls behind her.

She anxiously looked around every few seconds wondering what was taking them so long. "Professor Flitwick may I use the bathroom?"

He nodded, still trying to reach the quill.

Hermione hurried out and after making sure that no one was watching, had over to the Transfiguration room. She put her ear to the door.

"Is that a new robe Professor?"

Hermione sighed. She waited until Professor McGonagall turned around before tossing her clip at Sirius.

Sirius turned around and raised an eyebrow at her. Before she could debate hexing that annoyingly calm smile off his face, Professor McGonagall turned around. "Ms. Granger?"

"Professor Flitwick needs you," Hermione said quickly.

Professor McGonagall glanced at James and Sirius who smiled winningly in return. "No worries Professor," Sirius said charmingly. "We'll set off the dungbombs when you get back."

She sighed. "Ms. Granger, stay here for a minute." With that, she walked out briskly.

Hermione crossed her arms. "Well?" she demanded, eyeing them.

Peter frowned. "That look….," he snapped he fingers. "Molly! Molly Prewett!"

Remus laughed. "That's why she seemed so familiar, snapping at those two!" he said motioning toward James and Sirius.

Hermione was too shocked to speak for a second. "Molly? Curly red hair? Kind of scary when she's mad?"

Sirius grinned. "That's her! Lily must have mentioned her. You have her glare," he added cheekily.

Hermione bit her lip which was threatening to betray a smile. She had mastered Molly's glare, finding it useful in many situations involving Harry, Ron or the twins. Or all of them. "Anyway," she said briskly. "When are you setting them off?"

"Right now," James called over his shoulder as he and Sirius jogged out.

There was an awkward silence.

BOOM! CRASH! CLANG!

Remus and Peter exchanged grins and ran out. Just like the rest of the student body.

Hermione didn't bother and just huffed, watching through the door window. Students swarmed the corridors yelling and laughing as James and Sirius ran maniacally through the halls screaming nonsense and tossing fireworks into the air.

Hermione smiled remembering the dragon swallowing Umbridge and the same dragon was currently chasing Lily who was yelling death threats. James and Sirius looked afraid, but didn't stop.

Hermione sighed letting her head drop onto the desk. Closing her eyes she groaned. _What's wrong with me? I've just traveled back in time to Harry's dad's generation and yet...I'm not worried or scared._

"Hey Hermione?"

"Oh," Hermione quickly sat up, wiping her mouth in case of drool. "Hey Remus."

He looked amused. "You see, there was a slight...issue."

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**And now what did James and Sirius do? Hope you enjoyed!**


	4. Shirts and Skirts

**Chapter 4! Thanks to everyone who reviewed, you have know idea how much it helped! :D And a quick note: I'm going to write a few chapters to see where I'm going with this story so there may be a longer wait. If you have any ideas then feel free to PM me or add them in the reviews! Thanks everyone!**

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Hermione stared at him. For a very good reason, _slight issue_ had her panicked while hexes she could perform in her sleep, flashed through her mind. "What issue?" she demanded.

Remus didn't bother hiding his grin, but he had a good sense to hold a touch of sympathy. "Well it's kind of a compliment in a way… but basically, the prank was really good. So good that James and Sirius…sort of…took…credit for it."

Hermione stared at him. And stared. And stared. "You're kidding," she said finally.

Remus shook his head. "Sorry," he apologized, "but no." He motioned toward the 2 marauders who were happily chatting with a crowd of girls w He grinned seeing Lily's slightly annoyed expression as a bold girl flirted with James.

"What's so funny?" Hermione snapped, mistaking his grin at Lily for amusement at her. Before he could reply she cut in. "If you are amused by this scenario than there is something seriously – no pun intended – wrong with you. Instead of lecturing your friends about how utterly wrong this was and how they are going to lose any chance of endangering the human race by passing on their arrogant genes if not worse because that is exactly what I'm planning on doing, you are here grinning, _grinning! _Because this happened!" During this, she had been waving her hand with the wand, around as she spoke and it hit the wall, resulting in a crack. She looked at it horrified, no longer angry. "Oh no!"

"Don't worry," Remus said quickly. "Lily knows a spell for that. I think."

Hermione let out a sigh of relief which was freaky considering how angry she had been seconds ago. "Thank Merlin."

A loud laugh echoed in the hall, and Hermione's vision narrowed onto one person. Sirius Black.

Hermione stormed over to him, shoving through the huge crowds, her eyes flashing dangerously, her hair streaming behind her, her head practically steaming. His panicked face arranged itself into an easy grin. "Hey Mione," he greeted with a smirk.

Hermione clenched her fists at the nickname. "A word?" she grit out.

He nodded nervously. "Uh, yeah, totally! Why not?"

"Oh I'll show you why not," Hermione muttered, dragging him by his robes ignoring his manly cries of 'ow!'

Shoving him into an empty classroom, she whipped around and yanked his wand from his robes. "You have one minute," she said swiftly, the wand settling at his chest. "Explain yourself."

"Okay! So you see, uh…" he trailed off for a second, scratching is head. "Well, the prank was brilliant! Really brilliant! And we just…couldn't give you all the credit," he explained. "I mean not that there is anything wrong with you," he added hastily. "But we just had to take credit! We'll make it up to you! Marauder's honor."

Hermione slowly lowered her wand, mentally debating with herself.

_Should I kill him?_

_Well that'll just decrease your chances of leaving. Killing a Marauder would upset the other 3 who wouldn't help you then._

_But he deserves it!_

_All guys do. There's nothing extraordinary about him._

_Agreed. But…_

_No buts._

_But…_

_NO BUTS!_

_Okay!_

Meanwhile, Sirius was having a very similar debate. Very similar.

_Should I run?_

_Yeah._

_You're right._

He ran out.

Hermione rolled here eyes. "That's not very manly of you!" she yelled. She frowned feeling a slight buzzing in her pocket. The two way mirror! Pulling it out, she saw the familiar face of Ginny Weasley.

"Hermione! Where are you? Everyone's worried sick!" Her friend exclaimed. "Mum's going out of her mind!"

"I'm so sorry Ginny," Hermione apologized. "But…I uh...I'll be back in a few days."

Ginny's eyes widened. "A few days?! Where are you? Hold on a second." Some shuffling happened and Harry Potter replaced the redhead.

"Hermione! Where-"

"Harry is Ginny still here?" Hermione cut in.

Harry shook his head slowly. "No she head out to greet Charlie."

It wasn't that Hermione didn't trust Ginny, but she was pretty sure Harry would understand it better. She took a deep breath. "I time traveled."

She watched him carefully, expecting a grin to burst out or him to laugh. He just nodded. "Completely expected."

"And," Hermione hesitated. "I'm in 1975." She waited for the message to sink in. It did.

Harry's eyes widened. "Wait so you- Oh hey Ginny."

Hermione tapped the mirror and Harry's reflection vanished. She placed the mirror back in her pocket. _Well I guess I'm here for a couple of days._

When she head out, most of the crowds had cleared. Shooting James and Sirius death glares, she grabbed her bag and pulled out a thick book, burying herself in the clever spells.

_I'll live. Maybe. For now I'll go ask Lily to fix my wand._

2 days later…

"…and I didn't exactly understand the how the goblins could have done it when the weapons were metal," Lily explained.

Hermione nodded. "It doesn't work out. I'm pretty sure they were silver or else it wouldn't work." The Gryffindors had just had nap time (a.k.a. History of Magic) and the only 2 students who paid attention were discussing the goblin rebellion.

Hermione and Lily, being ever so similar, had quickly become close friends and easily split their homework everyday, getting it done in half the time it usually took them.

Sirius and James had shockingly kept their promise and that little bit of time left between flirting, being obnoxious, flirting, breaking rules, flirting, quidditch, flirting, attempting homework and flirting, they had made a plan Hermione was not yet aware of, to get her into trouble.

Sirius caught sight of Hermione and gave a nod to James. He and James came up behind her dragged her down the corridor, their ears permanently damaged from her shrieks.

"Keep it down!" Sirius hissed.

Hermione huffed, but kept quiet

"Okay." Sirius and James finally released her and she crossed her arms, glaring at them.

"What?" she repeated.

"We have a plan to get you into trouble," James announced

Hermione's anger changed to relief. "Alright what?"

Sirius cocked his head to the side as if greeting someone. Hermione turned around but the corridor was empty. She missed the nods they exchanged as she turned around. "What?"

Hermione breathed heavily, feeling a lot better now that she had let all this out. For some reason, they were smirking.

"Why are you smirking?"

Sirius's smirk widened. "It worked," he said with a grin. He pointed behind her.

Hermione whipped around and her eyes widened. "Oh! Hello Professor Dumbledore!"

* * *

**There you go! And do you guys think I'm moving along a bit too fast with the story or are you all fine with this pace?**


	5. Author's Note (Sorry not an update)

**Hi everyone! Sorry to those of you who thought this was a chapter...and don't kill me. I am SO SO sorry for not posting this earlier and thank my friend "Awesome as Annabeth" for reminding me! Since Red Maple started I've been kind of busy reading and couldn't update. The good news is that my friend and I are over halfway done, so the next update's in 2 weeks. **

**I'm also going to edit the previous chapters to make the writing a bit better so if you keep getting emails on this, I apologize in advance. And once again if you have any ideas for pranks or the plot, PM me or review.**

**I've also changed my username and this is the final time because I know it gets confusing.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed!**


	6. Issues and Explosions

**I apologize once again. I am a horrible horrible person for waiting so long!**

* * *

"Should I have any idea what's going on?" Lily said, confused, glancing at the 3 boys and Hermione. "Do you know them?"

Hermione took a deep breath.

_Merlin. How are you today? Do you think you could maybe open up the floor and swallow my bed? Please?_

_..._

_I'm waiting._

_..._

_OH COME ON!_

Hermione forced a smile on her face. "Lily, I PROMISE I will explain everything in 10 minutes. Please?"

Lily hesitated. "One question. Is this legal?"

Hermione paused. Was it? "Probably not," she answered truthfully.

"LILY!" James yelled from the common room. "MAY I SAY YOU LOOK EXCEPTIONALLY BEAUTIFUL TODAY?"

"He hasn't even seen me!" Lily rolled her eyes and yanked the door open. "NO YOU MAY NOT!" she screamed.

"OH! WELL THEN YOU LOOK...UGLY?"

Lily looked offended. "HEY!" She fumed out and 2 second later there was a yelling match downstairs.

There was a groan from the bed. Hermione looked over and saw Harry trying to get up, but not able to move the twins' tall lanky frames. With a sudden surge of strength, Hermione grabbed Fred and threw him off to the side, doing the same with George. "Ugh, cooties," Hermione muttered. This would be where Ginny would lecture her, and Hermione felt a sharp pang at the thought of her friend. "Harry, are you alright?"

"Mione, ah, I, uhhhhhh," Harry tried.

_Poor guy can't talk_. "Aguamenti," Hermione muttered and filled a glass with water which Harry drank.

"Uh, Mione? Can you give me some?" Fred moaned, rolling over.

"The only thing I can give you is a smack across the face," Hermione snapped.

When none of them bothered to respond, she continued.

"Right then," she snapped, glaring at him. "Would any of you 3 like to explain what is GOING ON?"

Harry mumbled something in the blanket. "Geflefkfsdl;fksdlfkjsd."

Hermione, apparently could understand that and her eyes widened. "Oh Merlin."

"Asdfjelaks;gdslf sldkf."

"But how..."

"sdlfjlsfjsdlfjsfls."

"Of course! How could I have missed that?" She turned to Fred and George who watching the exchange in confusion. Hermione, with her arms crossed across her chest, and piercing gaze, suddenly bore a strong resemblance to Molly Weasely, causing the twins to wince. "What were you thinking?"

"Ummm...that Harry needed a break from Ginny?"

"Ginny needed a break from Harry?"

"Hey!"

"Mum needed a break from us?"

"That she did," Hermione snapped. "Honestly, what do you think? And how do you expect me to explain this to James, Sirius, Remus, Peter and Lily?"

George's eyes widened and a grin broke out. "You're right! We better go thank them!"

Hermione looked at him in confusion. "What in the name of Fred's idiocy do you mean?"

He rolled his eyes. "Hermione do you have any idea how many times they helped us break the ruled with their map?"

"Oh...right, but you can't tell them you time traveled! I mean it."

"Awwwww..."

"Look," she said, annoyed. "Can you please just continue doing that and forget to mention a teeny tiny detail proving that you can't think sensibly?"

Before Fred could reply, voices screamed.

"DID YOU JUST COMPARE ME TO A ZUCCHINI?"

"NO LILY HE SAID YOU WEREN'T A ZUCCHINI! HONESTLY! IT'S OBVIOUS WHY YOU WEREN'T IN RAVENCLAW, YOU NEED BRAINS!"

Harry sat up wildly, his hair sticking up in every direction. "Lily? As in mom?" A hopeful look appeared in his eyes.

Hermione nodded. "Lily Evans." She didn't want to deny Harry the right to speak freely to them but she also knew they couldn't tell.

"Hermione?" George asked.

"Hmm?"

"Would telling them really be that bad?"

Hermione opened her mouth to retort, but stopped. _Since we don't exist yet...it wouldn't change their points of view. But if we told them they're going to die... _"Not yet," she said finally.

They shrugged and ran out, and exactly 8 seconds later, the argument stopped and was replaced with a loud conversation on pie.

"Sooo..." Harry said awkwardly. "They know you as Hermione right?"

Hermione nodded. "I'm a muggle born. My name won't matter. And hopefully Fred and George know that they're supposed to give fake names." She glanced at him. "How does Harry Thomas sound?"

"...weird."

Hermione rolled here eyes.

"Hey uh Hermione? How're you going to explain this to mom, I mean Lily?" he asked hurriedly.

Hermione opened her mouth to say something clever. "Well I'll obviously...ummm well something along the lines of- anything or- uh - well-," she sighed and sat down. "I don't know," she admit.

Harry stared at her. "What?" He could count on one hand the number times he'd heard Hermione say that on one hand.

Hermione scowled. "I don't know," she repeated.

"One more time?"

"Harry!"

He grinned. "Okay sorry. But do you think we should tell her the truth?"

Hermione hesitated. "I don't-" she stopped seeing his amused expression. "We don't exactly have a choice," she said pointedly. "I can't explain three guys randomly appearing in my bed without her thinking I'm on the dark side or insane. She's real smart and wouldn't be fooled by a little lie."

"Kind of like you," Harry said with a smile.

* * *

"YOU'RE WHAT?!"

Hermione winced. "I know it's crazy but it's true."

The red head paced around the room, shaking her head and muttering something every few seconds. "So let me get this straight. You're from the future and those guys who were on the floor were as well. The twins are your friend's brothers and the third guy is your friend. You accidentally used a time turner which is how you got here and that was why you were with the Marauders? And one of those boys is my son?"

Hermione nodded. "I'm sorry for lying but I didn't have a choice really."

Lily shook her head and to Hermione's surprise she laughed. "I'm not mad about that but I..."

Hermione let out a relieved sigh. "Thank Merlin!"

"But," Lily hesitated. "I have a son?"

Hermione nodded uncomfortably. "The third boy. My friend Harry." She took a deep breath. "Harry Potter."

Lily froze. "Harry...Potter? As in JAMES POTTER?"

"He looks exactly like him," Hermione explained. "Except-"

"He has his mother's eyes," a smug voice spoke.

Hermione turned around in horror. James stood there smugly with Sirius, while the twins and Harry stood by guiltily.


	7. Arrivals and the Truth

"Harry!" Hermione yelled.

"I'm sorry I didn't know!" Harry cried out, holding his hands up in surrender and backing up.

"We didn't either!" Fred added, looking way too pleased. "James was going to introduce us to Lily and we had no idea you were talking."

James, was still wearing that annoying smirk on his face. "I think you mean my future wife," he said pointedly, and Lily glared at him.

"Shut up Potter!"

"Anyway Lily, since we do end up married anyway, how's Hogsmeade next weekend? You can fall in love with me early!"

"Shut UP Potter!"

"Now Lily," Sirius said seriously. "You might want to be a bit nicer, to your future husband."

"Ugh!" Lily threw her hands up in frustration, and sat on the bed. "What happened to me?" Lily mumbled. "I have better taste!"

"Who has better taste?" Remus asked, calmly entering the room.

George rolled his eyes. "You heard the whole thing."

Remus had the sense to pretend to look sheepish.

Sirius and James however, were looking at Hermione. "So you're from...the future?"

Hermione glared at Harry again, but nodded. "Yep."

"Wicked. So?"

Hermione frowned. "So what?" she echoed, surprised at how calm this whole thing was. She had expected something way more dramatic and deadly.

"So where do we end up!?" Sirius asked impatiently.

Hermione and Harry exchanged glances. "Well..." Hermione started, not exactly sure how she should explain that '_James, you die. Lily you marry this thing and die. Sirius you end up in Azkaban and then escape and die. Remus you become a DA teacher, marry Sirius's cousin who's like two right now, and then die.'_

"James, you die," Fred said simply.

"Lily you marry James and die," George added.

"Sirius you end up in Azkaban-"

"-and escape and die."

"Remus you become a DA teacher-"

"-marry Sirius's cousin Tonks-"

"-and die," George finished off.

Silence.

"Oh," Sirius said awkwardly. "And Wormtail?"

Harry shrugged. "He dies."

"Ahhhh," James said wisely. "I thought so."

"Wait a second," Remus said, his forehead creased in confusion. "I _marry_ Nyphadora?"

"Tonks," Hermione corrected automatically. "You marry Tonks."

Sirius's eyes widened and he turned to glare at Remus. "You marry my cousin?"

Remus was fairly pale and he shook his head. "No I don't! I don't!" he said nervously. "I don't," he added again.

"You do," Harry said, eyeing them wearily.

Hermione pulled out her wand at the same time as Lily and Sirius didn't need a further warning.

_"Hermione! You had better not ignore me again!"_

James glanced around. "Who said that?"

Hermione sighed. "Ginny." She pulled out the two way mirror to see a very annoyed red haired girl glaring at her.

_"How could you leave me on the edge like that?" Ginny cried out. "And Harry! Really? We're still trying to understand Hermione and then you walk off! Wasn't nearly dying a hundred times enough? Or did you have to make it a hundred and one?" _Ginny then turned to Fred and George._ "And I'm not even going to bother with you two, but as a heads up, mum's sending you both a howler."_

Fred and George winced.

"Who's that?" Lily asked curiously, her helplessness, temporarily forgotten.

_Ginny's eyes widened and she grinned. "Is that Lily? As in Harry's mom?"_

Hermione nodded. "They just found out," she said with a shake of her head.

_"Ohhhhhhh," Ginny trailed off, but she was enjoying it. "So have I been talked about yet?"_

"No you're not important enough," Hermione said with a roll of her eyes. "Bye."

_"Hey! Hermione Jean Granger don't you dare-mmmph!"_

Harry gave the mirror a nervous glance. "She's going to get you for that."

"Probably," Hermione said with a shrug. "I'll make it up to her later."

"So how does Ginny - or whoever she is - fit into all this?" Remus asked.

Harry turned a bit red. "Oh...uh...she's my girlfriend," he mumbled. "Ginny Weasley."

Sirius was looking amused at Harry's red face, but grinned. "Nice."

Lily looked up. "Weasley? As in Arthur Weasley?!"

"And Molly," Harry added. "Molly..."

"Prewett," Hermione said quickly. "Look we've already told you all enough, and since you two," she motioned to James and Sirius, "aren't exactly humble, you're probably going to go announce it anyway-"

James held up his hand and whipped off his glasses dramatically. "I'm humble enough to know I'm better than everybody," he said seriously.

Hermione stared at him. "What will Lily see in you?!"

Lily let out an exceptionally loud cough.

Remus glanced at her. "Cough drop?" he asked innocently.

Lily shook her head. "No sorry, it was just the horror of the situation."

Hermione shook her head. "Never mind that." She pulled out a sheet of paper from her drawer and performed a wandless, wordless charm on it, before holding it out. "James, Sirius, Fred and George write your names down."

James and Sirius obeyed, but George and Fred glanced at her. "Is this the same charm as DA?"

Hermione shook her head. "Sign," she ordered.

"Why don't Lily, Harry and Remus have to sign?" George whined.

"Cause they're trustworthy."

Fred shook his head. "I'm hurt by your lack of faith in us Hermione. Really. I'm wounded, scarred, ruined beyond repair-"

"Shut up Fred."

"Yes ma'am."

He signed.

"Whatever," Harry said. "This has to be kept between the...eight of us. Okay?"

Sirius shrugged. "Sure," he said carelessly. He and James leaned in and muttered something and then looked up. "So what happens if we tell?"

"Your skin turns hot pink, you get attached to the ceiling by your feet, and you sing opera until I have mercy on you."

James paled.

Lily grinned.

_Why do I still not trust him? _Hermione thought.

"Hey Hermione?"

"Hmm?"

"Are your parents retarded?"

"Excuse me?!"

"Cause you sure are special!"


	8. Explanations and Signatures

No one except Lily and Harry were brave enough to approach Hermione after what happened. Although Harry was kind of used to it, already seeing how scary she could get when she was mad. Saying she was angry was an understatement though. She was livid, practically radiating anger, causing several things to explode every few seconds. The first and second years avoided her completely for the evening, but everyone was much more at ease the next day when the fifth years left for the dungeons for their potions class.

"Hermione?" It was Harry. He hesitated before walking alongside her, nervously eyeing her wand.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I'm not going to kill _you_ Harry," she said loudly, piercing the Marauders with a glare. Well, James and Sirius. She decided to go easy on Remus who shot her an apologetic smile and dragged to other two a bit farther away.

"Could you, maybe avoid talking to them until you cool down?" Harry asked.

Hermione took a deep breath. "If they apologize greatly, and I mean GREATLY then I can try to go easy on them."

"What's easy?"

Hermione shrugged. "I'll think about it." She walked ahead of everyone trying to control the anger rising inside her as they all head into Slughorn's room. She sat down beside Lily, and fortunately the Marauders were at the other end of the classroom. She didn't notice that the twins weren't there.

"Shove over!"

"My elbow's gonna be seen!"

"At least your face isn't! Besides I have the camera!" George hissed.

Fred folded his elbow over painfully and muttered something under his breath. Both twins became perfectly still however, when they saw Harry glance over their way curiously. His eyes widened as he glanced between the wavering space of air and the Marauders. He shook his head and closed his eyes, rubbing his forehead

"Poor Harry," Fred said without a shred of sympathy. "Caught in the middle with awesomeness on one side and Hermione on the other."

"Hey it'll be worth it!" George reminded him. "Think of mum's reaction!"

Fred's wince changed to a grin as James shot them a thumbs up and they turned on the camera. "That it will."

"Ow!"

"Shut up!"

Remus shook his head at his friend's stupidity, which he thought he was use to. Sirius, while looking nervous, also looked incredibly pleased with himself as several guys shot him a thumbs up. A bottle of ink exploded as Hermione sat down, drenching James's uniform, although he barely noticed.

"Now then!" Professor Slughorn began cheerfully. "Everyone open up to page 132 and…" he trailed off, searching his desk for something. He frowned in annoyance.

Lily raised her hand. "Is everything alright Professor?"

"Hm," Slughorn didn't reply for a second, before snapping back into focus, his smile replacing the frown. "Fine Miss Evans, thank you." Addressing the class he said, "now, I'll just be a minute, you all behave yourselves."

James leaned forward and grinned at Remus and Peter. "What would you say if Sirius asked her out now?"

Peter stared at him. "You're kidding." He'd better be kidding! The girl was already fuming!

"And what would you say knowing that Fred and George are video taping this?" James asked, his grin widening.

"What's video taping?" Sirius asked curiously.

James shrugged. "Some muggle thing," he said carelessly. "It's like moving photographs except it'll show everything happening - the full time - instead of a couple seconds. Stole it from Hermione."

"And I'm going to have myself recorded," Sirius added proudly.

Peter shook his head wildy. "You are kidding!" He looked ready to faint.

Sirius smirked. "Nope. I'll really do it. And make it out alive!"

Remus snorted. "Good luck with that. With the way you get on her nerves I'd says she'll Avada Kedavra you before you open your mouth."

Sirius mildly waved his hand. "Don't worry Mooney, I'll just work the charm!

Remus raised an eyebrow and grinned. "Bet you 20 galleons you'll make an excuse about your homework when she gives you 'the look'. The look was the nickname for Hermione's baleful glare.

"You're on!" Sirius tossed 20 galleons on the desk as Hermione entered the common room, sitting down beside Lily. "See," Sirius said, motioning toward her. "She's fine! I bet she secretly enjoyed it."

"Yeah and I'm secretly You-Know-Who," James said sarcastically.

"This is Hermione," Remus reminded them, but he was ignored. He always was when he was right.

Sirius walked over to Hermione….

James and grinned wickedly...

Peter watched nervously, chewing his fingernails…

Lily and Remus pulled out their wands, eyeing each other…

Slughorn, unnoticed by everyone, paused in the doorway, sensing the tense atmosphere….

And every student looked at Hermione….

"Oh Hermione!" Sirius sang. Hermione whipped around with the speed of an Auror and had her wand jamming at Sirius's throat in less than a second.

Lily who usually didn't care about the punishments Sirius suffered, just shook her head at him. Her expression clearly said he was stupid.

Sirius's grin wavered as she scowled up at him. "Well?" she demanded.

Sirius gulped. "I, uh, needed help with last minute homework!" he blurted out. He didn't have to turn around to see Remus smirk and pull the galleons into his pocket.

Harry snickered quietly and mouthed 'real smooth' to him. Sirius didn't dare try to mouth 'shut up' back in case Hermione took it the wrong way. "It doesn't make any sense," he improvised.

Without looking away, Hermione let out a huff. "Harry."

Harry, with an entirely too smug expression, walked over to Sirius's desk, held out his hand and James handed him the parchment with a grin and wink.

Pushing his glasses up his nose, Harry read, "Write down an ingredient in your favorite potion." He shook his head at Sirius while trying not to laugh.

Hermione took a quivering breath. "Sirius, what part of that do you not understand?" she gritted out. "Or was there something else you wanted?"

Sirius put on his best puppy dog eyes. "I don't have a favorite potion!" he whined. "Can you please help me? Please? That's all I'm asking for! I'll even take you out to Hogsmeade to make up for it!"

A series of 'awwwwwww's came from the girls, except Lily who just rolled her eyes.

"Sirius, if for some reason you don't have a favorite potion then just write down water drops since they're used in the stupidity potion!" Hermione looked at him like he was stupid. Which he was. "Was it that hard to do?"

Sirius nodded, wide eyed. "It was Hermione," he said seriously. "It really was."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I'm not stupid," she said flatly. "What did you really want?"

"Huh?"

Hermione sighed. "You were talking to James and Remus, obviously betting on something and then you come over to me. I can put 2 and 2 together. Couldn't you?"

Lily snorted. "Can Sirius even put 1 and 1 together?"

Hermione actually thought. "Well maybe if they're really simple 1 and 1's." She turned back to the clearly offended Sirius. "What did you want?"

Sirius hesitated. "Ummm, could you move your wand away a bit? Like a centimeter or a meter? And then move back about a kilometer? You're jamming my vocal cords."

Hermione moved it a millimeter.

"Right then," Sirius said with a fake laugh, inching away and wishing Professor Slughorn would come back. He got down on one knee…

...and pulled out a velvet box.

Hermione's eyes widened and she was so surprised (not a positive reaction, I mean it's Hermione!) that she moved her wand.

Several girls gasped and giggled while the boys watched in awe.

Sirius opened it with one hand to reveal…a half eaten ring pop. Hermione stared at him in disbelief.

He stood back up and looked down at her earnestly. "Hermione," he took a deep breath. "Hermione I wanted to ask you…" Sirius couldn't remember what lame pick up line he originally wanted to use. So he settled for this amazing one he and James made up. "You're like a trash can, can I take you out?"

And then he ran past Slughorn yelling, "I'M GONNA DIE!." Hermione tried to run after him, a zillion jinxes flying through her mind except…she tripped. Her shoe laces had been tied together. Sirius Black.

Lily and Remus recognized the expression she held and immediately called out, "Evacuate to the common room!"

In 10 seconds the dungeon was empty except for Harry who was trying to talk to Hermione and Slughorn who remained frozen in the doorway until Professor McGonagall dragged him off to help find Mr. Black.

In and hour, Harry took Hermione to Hogsmead for a drink to get her to relax.

And finally, Fred and George yanked off the invisibility cloak and stretched out, with huge smirks on their faces.

"Now let's send these to mum."

"We'll have to think of something soon," Lily said quietly as she and Hermione sat down in the Great Hall.

Hermione nodded, taking a bite of pizza. "Let's try Ginny." She pulled out the mirror. "Ginny Weasley," she whispered, and the redhead was immediately on. "Jeez do you spend your whole time waiting for us?" Hermione asked with a laugh as she and Lily ducked over it.

Ginny nodded with a grin. "Ron and I take shifts. He's currently getting us lunch. What's up? Did Sirius hit on you again?"

Lily laughed. "Obviously." She started to explain the prank war, but looked up. "Can't talk," she muttered. Ginny nodded, but didn't leave

They stopped talking as the Marauders and twins entered, loudly laughing and hollering (minus Remus and Peter) causing several girls to stare longingly and the professors to frown in annoyance. The group sat down right across from the girls, grinning brightly.

After piling their plates, Sirius turned to them with a smirk. "So Hermione," he started.

Hermione sighed. "Sirius if this is another stupid pick up line then forget it," she warned.

Sirius pouted. "I was only going to ask you how you became so beautiful."

Hermione stared and Lily masked a laugh. She didn't need to look down to see Ginny snickering. She flicked the mirror off. "I must have gotten your share," she said giving him a weird look.

Remus laughed and gave her a thumbs up while Sirius was frozen in shock. "Snap out of it!"

"How did that not work?" James hissed.

"There's something wrong with her," Sirius hissed back. "She's not normal!"

"I heard that," Hermione snapped. "Shut up Ginny," she muttered.

"Well it's true!" Sirius burst out. "My personal record for getting a girl to fall for a pick up line is a second! Beating James's second and a half! My longest time is 1 minute! And you…," he struggled with the words, "...you just don't...function right!"

Hermione and Lily stared at him before dissolving into laughter.

Sirius groaned and pouted as Remus patted his arm, while laughing himself. "Function right!" he shook his head with a grin. "Of all the adjectives in the world!"

Peter frowned. "But wasn't James at half a second?"

James nodded. "I was!" He frowned. "But my latest is so far 2 years," he said motioning to Lily.

Peter grinned. "First time for everything."

Lily inwardly smirked. _Not this time._

James nodded thoughtfully. He cleared his throat. "Evans!" he said brightly. "Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?"

Lily slowly turned and gave him an innocent look. "Must have been once. I never make the same mistake twice."

James smirked. "There's a first time for everything," he quoted.

"Including a 'no' from a girl for 2 years!" Lily retorted. "Honestly Potter!"

James and Sirius exchanged glances. "Girls don't function right," the said simultaneously.

Hermione frowned. "Where are the twins?" she demanded.

"Flirting off with some Hufflepuffs," Peter said motioning over toward two blushing girls who were talking to a pair of grinning red heads. Catching Hermione's glare, the hastily said goodbye.

"We're not supposed to establish any connections!" Hermione exclaimed as they came over.

"Relax," George rolled his eyes. "It was just a bit of flirting."

At that minute, Sirius, who was making a not so nice remark about Hermione, knocked over his hot chocolate. The steaming creamy drink fell onto James's hand who roared and clutched it tightly. His elbow knocked into his glass, spilling the drink on Remus who accidentally spilled his on Peter who accidentally spilled his on Fred who accidentally spilled his on George who caught his elbow just in time, leaving his glass. He picked it up, and dumped it on Sirius's head. All of this happened in 5 seconds. The 6 boys were all hollering and shoving things over.

Lily sighed. Was there any point to removing house points? She glanced over at Hermione and was surprised to see a smirk on the girl's face.

Hermione leaned over. "What do you think they'd think if they found hot chocolate…in their showers?"


End file.
